Have you ever loved someone who only throws crumbs of love your way, giving you crumbs of hope? I have, and what a waste of living! Too often as women, we set our sights on a particular man, and our hearts soar with anticipation and expectations. Our hopes and fantasies sometimes blinds our vision and dulls our hearing in the hopes that our love desire will somehow be who and what we think we need, and yearn for in our lives. That’s a mouth full!
We sit by the phone incessantly waiting for a call, text or some other message. We scour our emails to ensure we haven’t missed a note, or we peruse social media. Sometimes, we find excuses to call our love interest, or be available at their beck and call. And, my on my…. when we are finally privileged with their presence, our hearts throb, and we think a piece of heaven has stepped on the scene. And, the scenario repeats over and over. Until…duh, we realize that doing the same thing again and again, i.e., loving someone who chooses not to love us back or has no desire to commit is futile; if not just plain insanity.
The movie “The Holiday” epitomizes a woman who loved someone for several years to finally realize that he did not love her, but wanted to keep her in his life for his purposes. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LZQV6NjR_bI But, when Iris (the character in the movie) takes a holiday vacation, she realizes that she has essentially been the dog eating the crumbs from her imagined committed partner. As the story evolves, she realizes she is designed to be the leading lady and finally breaks up with her love interest. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P1CMnZDllDU
Many women want to be the leading lady in their relationship to no avail. So, instead, many of us settle for crumbs of love, which leads to imagined crumbs of hope. These crumbs often lead to a deeper sense of loneliness and despair. We settle for being the best friend at best, or just a tool in someone’s hand. And, so again, the cycle repeats, until we are redeemed from ourselves. 
Redeemed from ourselves? Now that is a thought! This feat of redemption is attempted by some through mediation, yoga, spirituality, humanness, religion, hardness of heart, etc. But, others, like myself, look to the One true and only Redeemer who consistently reminds us that He is our TRUE love and He prepares the “Boaz” of our dreams. (Read about Boaz in the Bible, Ruth 2) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xPevgTJDp7E
Ladies, there is never a short cut when true love is at stake. And, settling for less than G-d’s best, usually spells disaster and emotional violence. I know this from personal experience, and from conversations with many women who have experienced crumbs of love.
Loneliness is a (fill in the blank)! Believe me, when I tell you, I know and I’ve got the first-place award! However, living with g-dly principles, and choosing G-d’s way is so worth the adventure. Has the “right one” found me…not yet. But, he’s headed my way. Can’t wait. But, in the meantime, I’m growing from G-d’s transformative lessons and hoping to encourage others in their relationships.
I’m living life and doing my best to serve G-d, family and friends. If you find yourself settling for second place in the life of a man you are dating, or befriending, and he is not interested in a commitment; stop wasting your time wishing and hoping in a fantasy. Stop settling for crumbs of hope or crumbs of love. Instead, drop and pray! Seek G-d’s comfort, counsel, and ask G-d to send His best.
What are crumbs of love or crumbs of hope? Crumbs…being involved with someone who gives you hints that there might be a future; or he does nice things, and your inference – he’s into me. Maybe he comments that you are so like the type of woman, he would like to spend the rest of his life with…you know the innuendos that men will say in order to either manipulate, or keep you in the loop to serve their purposes. Let’s be real! Men or women will do and say manipulative things to serve their narcissistic appetites, if they are not people who pant after the One and True Living G-d.
Yet, for those of us who desire to live within a covenant marriage; games, lies, manipulations, innuendos, etc. are taboo, and have no place in any loving relationship. Our Savior gave His very best…Himself for His people. This is our example! This is our true love interest!
Start 2017 loving G-d and self, and leave all crumbs for the vacuum.
#Justsaying,
Dr. Dee
It has often been said that actions speak louder than words. However, is this always the case? I wonder.
courage to change if need be. Then, maybe, our words, as well as our actions will be steeped in G-dly honey, love, and all the precious goodness as modeled by our Messiah.
and expecting the eagle to crash under the conditions of the weather, he was quite surprised by what he saw. He noticed that as the storm raged, the eagle set his wings in such a manner as to fly high above the storm. The eagle did not attempt to bear the storm, nor did he attempt to fight the storm. The eagle set his wings as to rise above the storm to higher heights. Such as it is with Believers. When the storms of life are wreaking havoc in our homes, marriages, finances, relationships, health and more, just like the eagle, we should set our wings (hearts) on the promises of G-d, and allow Him to help us weather the storms of life. We ought to allow G-d to take us to higher heights. (Isaiah: 40:31)
ent, and continue in the way of the Cross and Resurrection, which exemplifies love, self-renunciation, and embraces the character of the Father, as was displayed through Yeshua. Will this happen overnight? Again, a rhetorical question! It is a moment by moment conscious decision of commitment and effort.
The ultimate meaning of each moed is found in Messiah Yeshua, and to revel in these feasts helps us to understand Him as the vivid prophetic Savior of the world. Consider these two examples: Yeshua was the Pesach Lamb (Passover Lamb), the Lamb of G-d who took away the sins of the World. (John 1:29) Yeshua was/is our atonement who has reconciled us with the Father, Yom Kippur. (Romans 3:23-26) Our faith, I believe, is strengthen as our love deepens and our hearts overflow with gratitude, as we realize all G-d had planned for us prior to the foundation of the world. I believe, that when we commit to these feasts as a practical application of our worship to the King, we draw near to the Holy One and experience His majesty.
L’Shana Tova! Blessings for a good and sweet New Year!
It begins the High Holy Days and is a time for celebration, as well as reflection.