Tag Archives: love

Actions Speak

actions-speak It has often been said that actions speak louder than words. However, is this always the case? I wonder.

Sometimes words speak louder in the form of an email or a letter, yelling, screaming, exhortation, even silence. Sometimes the author’s purpose is lost in the reader’s or listener’s comprehension. Sometimes messages are read with such disdain that the true intent of the author’s purpose is lost. Then again, sometimes words can be used to hide pretentious actions. Hmm– not really sure. Sometimes words seem to speak louder than actions. What do you think?

What I do know, is that if we want others to think we are different or that we have been transformed by the Holy Spirit, then our actions have to look different and gracious, and our words whether written or spoken have to drip with G-dly honey. In other words, if we want others to think we are loving, then we have to act and speak lovingly. If we want others to think we have a pleasant and inviting personality, then we must display this as well. We cannot expect others to see or hear transformation within us, when we act in the very way their criticism suggests.

We all see things fuzzy, even though our pride suggests otherwise, and our arrogance allows us to build walls of self-sustenance. Yet, if we embrace a faith of love and grace, then it is my prayer that G-d shows us our pride and arrogance, and that we have the walk-the-talkcourage to change if need be. Then, maybe, our words, as well as our actions will be steeped in G-dly honey, love, and all the precious goodness as modeled by our Messiah.

As always, it’s our choice.

#DocsMusing,

Dr. Dee

Love Reflections

My son came for a brief visit from Korea. It was great seeing him and spending time with him. As I reflect on our visit, I am amazed at how fast the time has passed and how very little we get to see each other, because of the physical landscape which divides us. However, in reality we are not separated, because of the great love we have for each other. I am grateful for the time we had together.

This reflection mirrors in a very tiny way the love G-d has for His people! Even though we don’t physically see our Heavenly Father, His presence is like the wind – we feel Him, we embrace His love, and we know He is there! (John 3:8)

I am often amazed by the great love G-d has for me in spite of my failures and flaws. His love fills my heart and guides me as I am obedient to His will. Even more special is that G-d’s love is available to all who choose to grab hold of his garment and journey with Him.

I am reading a book which speaks to the fact that our days must be propelled by our view of eschatology as the promise of G-d. In other words, we must base our today knowing that G-d’s promises and love are our horizon and our goal! We might want to consider living in ways, which are pleasing to G-d, since He promised He would be back, as oppose to living our lives independent of Him.

Love is one of those words which we hear – more often than its practices imply! I am encouraged to love G-d and love others, because He first loved me and continues to love me! I am encouraged to love those who abuse me, and mistreat me; even my enemies, because Yeshua  (Jesus) modeled great love for those who hated Him.

Be encouraged to love others and spend time with them while it is today. Let those you love know you love them by your words, actions and deeds. Never be afraid to say, I love and appreciate you.

#DocsMusings,

Dr. Dee

Hatin’

Are there people in your life that you just don’t like and do not trust? Frankly, there are people in my life that I do not like and do not trust! However, because I love G-d and wish to please Him, I am committed to love and respect them, and attempt to understand them and their ways. In other words, I am committed to building bridges of friendship and respect! Why – because, after loving G-d with all of our hearts, souls, minds and bodies, we are commanded to love our neighbors as ourselves. Who is my neighbor? Everyone outside of myself, including my family and friends.

In my attempts to do right first by G-d and then others, I find myself searching for the reasons why I do not like certain people. In my search, I have found that those who think they are better than I am, or those that ridicule others, or are just plain mean, evil, and those who lack integrity to name a few, just simply get on my nerves. Yet, I am sure I get on the nerves of others, even though I may fail to see why!

celebrate-life-poster

Therefore, as a quick reminder as we are visiting our friends, families, in-laws and outlaws, during this season, let us remember that everywhere we go, we prove who we are, and who we belong too. If we belong to the Father of Heaven and Earth, we are obligated to treat others in ways, which draw them to Him. We are obligated to die to ourselves and search for ways to allow the light of HaShem to shine forth. Mostly, we are obligated to pray for our attitudes and ourselves, and to ask G-d to help us see others as He sees them – mainly…needing Him! Then, we must pray for those who grate our souls, and ask G-d to help us be loving and kind towards them! We must remember we are in need of a Savior as well.

If you belong to the living G-d, enjoy your family, friends, outlaws and in-laws, and enjoy all your blessings from Him! Are there people in your life that you just don’t like and do not trust?  Live, laugh, and love and don’t waste time hatin’ on others. Instead, live the best you can being the best  you can.

#DocsMusings,

Dr. Dee

I read a story about a man who watched an eagle fly over in the Himalayas during a storm, eagle-night-stormand expecting the eagle to crash under the conditions of the weather, he was quite surprised by what he saw. He noticed that as the storm raged, the eagle set his wings in such a manner as to fly high above the storm.  The eagle did not attempt to bear the storm, nor did he attempt to fight the storm.  The eagle set his wings as to rise above the storm to higher heights.  Such as it is with Believers. When the storms of life are wreaking havoc in our homes, marriages, finances, relationships, health and more, just like the eagle, we should set our wings (hearts) on the promises of G-d, and allow Him to help us weather the storms of life. We ought to allow G-d to take us to higher heights. (Isaiah: 40:31)

Few readers know my history, but I have had my share of storms.  In the midst of my challenges, I have not always acted in a G-dly manner. Imagine that! Yet, I despise confrontations or anything which disrupts harmony, even though I may be the problem! Still, I realize that challenges, conflicts, confrontations are a part of life, and even necessary in order to change and grow. I have come to realize that even in my rightness or self-righteousness whether justified or not, pales in comparison to the redemptive work G-d provides through our Savior.  G-d has not called me to respond in my self-righteousness, stubbornness, and/or selfishness, He has called me to respond to Him with love and obedience.

Hum, well, how do I accomplish this feat? Simply, through Messiah, prayer, obedience and practice. Is it easy? A resounding NO! Have I accomplished, always responding with love, kindness, goodness, mercy, generosity…you know the answer. Believe me, it is easier to say I am a Believer, than to live and smell like a Believer. So what’s next? Do I give up?  Heaven forbid!

Heaven beckons me to repeagle-above-storm-dayent, and continue in the way of the Cross and Resurrection, which exemplifies love, self-renunciation, and embraces the character of the Father, as was displayed through Yeshua. Will this happen overnight? Again, a rhetorical question! It is a moment by moment conscious decision of commitment and effort.

My point, know that storms will destroy you and/or your family, if you fail to embrace G-d’s way. But, if you see yourself like G-d’s eagle with Him as the wind under your wings, you will weather any storm, and soar to greater heights in Him. It may be a slow flight or even a delay, but He promises He will be with us. (Hebrews 13:5; Deuteronomy 31:6)

Are you in the midst of a storm? Look up to the heavens, and know G-d will see you through, because of His great love for you, if you allow Him. Have you just come out of a storm? Then, look up to the heavens, and be grateful for G-d’s protection, lessons and/or provisions. Haven’t had a storm lately? Brace yourself, one might soon be on the way. How will you handle the eminent storms of life? As always, you choose. eagle-with-verse

#DocsMusing,

Dr. Dee

happy-rosh-hashanahL’Shana Tova! Blessings for a good and sweet New Year!

May your New Year be filled with the sweetness and prosperity found only in Yeshua’s (Jesus) abundant grace.

Welcome the Jewish Year 5777!

Rosh Hashanah or the Feast of Trumpets – rings in the Jewish New Year with 100 blasts of the shofar. shofar It begins the High Holy Days and is a time for celebration, as well as reflection.

As Jewish people the world over consider the coming year, they pray for G-d’s forgiveness, and that He will “seal” them in the Book of Life for the year ahead. Year by year, they pray to be acceptable in His sight.

As Believers, in Yeshua, we have been brought near to G-d through the righteousness of Messiah and we are sealed in the Lamb’s Book of Life. (Ephesians 1:13, 2:13, Revelation 13:6) Let us rejoice in the salvation of our King and L-rd, reflect on all His goodness and tender mercies, and let us pray for each other,  for the Shalom (peace) of Jerusalem and the world. black-man-shofar

L’Shana Tova!

Dr. Dee

Prayer for Us

mighty-arms

You, L-rd, will keep the needy safe and will protect us forever from the wicked,
who freely strut about when what is vile is honored by the human race.

Psalm 12: 7-8

Dear Abba,

Your Word is true and You are not like any human that is fearful, lies, full of pride, sin and arrogance. We oftentimes justify our sins, excuse our laziness, and our personal gods are the bedfellows we cuddle up to night after night, day after day.  Unfortunately, we often do that which we know is wrong, and fail to do that which is right. We so many times elevate our needs over others and strut about in self-righteousness as a peacock wooing a mate.  Abba, many of our ways are devoid of purity, and yet, we say we are good, we are decent; at least some of the times, I am guilty of such.  How can we claim goodness and fail to trust, love and act according to the purposes you have laid out for us in your Word?

We delude ourselves and thus, we strive in a fog of self-idolatry and misconception! We esteem personal needs, goals and desires over You and for that we are surrounded by the vileness of that reality.  Yet, You have provided the light of Yourself, which is the bridge from emptiness, vileness, deceit and more, into the purity of You!  You are the only true hope for our longing souls.

The local and the world news is littered with the depravity of humanities’ failures and preferences for evil.  Our society is infected with violence and confusion which gnaws at the depths of our souls, and attempts to confuse and darken our journey. These are my musings, Abba; but, again, You are there…always there!  You beckon us into Your perfect peace through Your perfect patience, and Your perfect love to return to You and receive the ultimate gift of prosperity…. You and YOU alone!

prayer-with-rootsHelp us, help me, my family, my friends, my enemies, those reading this blog to see, hear and respond to Your calling, Your wooing.  Let Your voice thunderously permeate our souls turning us from darkness and despair… to YOU, the perfect protector, and lover of our souls. Profoundly help us to see, and hear, and respond in ways which provide You pleasure. Help us to remember, we were created for Your glory!

The days are extremely dark with violence, wickedness and mayhem continuously nipping at us and for some of us, dulling our senses! Yet, YOU are greater than the oppression, depression, destruction and mayhem plaguing our society.  Aid us in truly believing in Your greatness and love for us, and Your desire for us to live an abundant life in You!

Thank you for Your Word, Your Faithfulness, Your love, Your Son, Your Spirit, Your Protection, Your Provision, Your Providence, Your forgiveness! Thank you for being You!

I love you, Abba,

drdee

Enjoy The Process

goal

Ever heard the following?

  • Enjoying the process
  • Smelling the roses along the way
  • Comfortable with being uncomfortable
  • Trusting when the end is not near
  • Seeing where only faith leads
  • Prayer were no other path leads
  • Goal achieved now what…

For me, they all mean the same thing…

Recently, I read that achievement seldom produces a sense of lasting happiness as one might think. I can truly attest to this. After receiving my doctorate, I thought I would be so happy, but shortly after graduation, (which by the way, no one could attend), it was really no big deal, and I have considered going back to school, and getting another graduate degree. For me, being in school afforded me a definite sense of purpose, a refuge, a circle of acquaintances, and a goal to work towards. In other words, a sense of direction. I have found, and other experts as well, that once a person finally accomplishes a goal, at least two new goals come along unexpectedly. And, that which we worked so hard to achieve, and chased after for so long, soon becomes the status quo. Yet, our achievement though exhilarating, along with a sense of satisfaction, we are also frustrated and desiring a new adventure or goal. In my case, I had mixed emotions. On the one hand I was excited about earning my degree; yet, I thought and felt…now what? What am I going to do now?

Consider other goals, whether losing weight, getting a promotion, some business venture, exotic vacation or even considering marriage. If you have ever been in love, then, you know about those special moments of euphoria and the fluttering of your heart when you think about that special someone, hear their voice and/or lay your eyes on them! Remember when you couldn’t wait to see them or hear their voice, or how much you hated to say goodbye? Then something began to change, especially after the honeymoon for at least 50% of marriages in this country.

How many of you longed, even ached to get married? Many people who have anxiously anticipated being married to their lover, soul mate, and/or best friend of choice in a blissful ever after scenario, have been devastated by the nightmare they felt trapped in. Once married, they were disillusioned by the difficulties of living with this special someone, and often times fled the relationship. Again, at least 50% of married folks in this country choose to flee their marriages, though some need to flee, many of us are afraid or unwilling to die to self and be a loving spouse. Yet, those who endure to the end tend to thrive through the challenges, and happily live their lives with their mate.

Our goals in life whether reached or not gives us a sense of purpose or at least helps us to feel worthy of this opportunity called life. However, I have found that often times, people are so focused on the goal, that they fail to enjoy the process, or give up when matters get difficult. I have been guilty of this.

Many of us get so focused on the goal, that we fail to enjoy the process or we flee from our purpose in hopes of escaping whatever we find problematic. Yet, in my many years on planet earth, I have come to realize that we/I must enjoy the process in all areas of my life, or life is just existing; or in many cases just working to survive and going through the motions.Health500

Now, when it comes to work, I can hang with the best of them. As a matter of information, all the letters behind my name were earned as an adult, raising children, while unemployed, during an extremely challenging marriage(s), during a divorce(s), working full time, deaths of family members, and/or working full time. I know about working, multi-tasking and the like. I mean intimately acquainted with trying to do it all! Even now, as a mature woman working full-time, building a business, co-producing a radio program, writing a book, this blog, etc., more often than not, I feel like the absent-minded professor running around doing it all, yet doing nothing or at least not getting it all accomplished in the manner most effective without sleep deprivation, irritability, stress and the like!

Still, in spite of the challenges or the goals we aim for, I have learned that we must enjoy life along the way. I have found that doing the following things on a consistent basis are extremely helpful for enjoying the process of life as you reach for your goals, after achieving your goals; and then reaching for new or higher goals. We should always strive for higher and worthy goals! This is a biblical principle handed down from Heaven. Therefore, I live by the following and I encourage you to embrace many if not all as well:

  • Daily prayer, reading G-d’s Word, and interaction with like-minded people
  • Sleep/Rest: G-d created the Shabbat (Sabbath) for a reason. He knew many of us would work ourselves into the grave as a result of unbalanced or an obsession to achieve our goals or dreams. Our insistence on embracing sleep-deprivation and lack of rest causes chronic tiredness, illness, irritability, stress and premature death. We need a weekly Shabbat for a reason. Really and truly, sleep will find us whether we like it or not.
  • sabbathHealthy Choices: Sleep/rest is a healthy choice, but also the foods we eat. Choose clean foods, minimize fast foods, processed foods, soda and sugar. You will feel different and be more energetic with mental clarity.
  • Exercise is vital for weight loss, flexibility, stress reduction and more. We need to exercise our bodies to optimally perform each day. Our bodies are the only place we have to live.
  • Celebrate and love others.
  • Be grateful for all things in your life. Celebrate the great and good. Learn from the not-so-good.
  • Help others achieve and grow. Be an example of determination, persistence and generosity.
  • Try to see the good and have a positive attitude.
  • Spend time doing things you enjoy and spend time with family and friends.
  • Laugh, have fun and enjoy being you. Laughter does do the heart, mind, soul good!

live in bodyWorthy goals, dreams, and desires, as well as working towards them have their place. Yet, on the way to success, remember to enjoy life throughout the process. Once you achieve whatever goal(s) you are longing for, enjoy that process and the new goals soon to follow. Again, enjoy wherever you find yourself in life, otherwise, what awaits you on the other side, may be more disappointing than you imagined.

#DocsMusing,

Dr. Dee

Challenging Relationships

couple on red couchRelationships can be challenging especially when goals and desires are different, and the marriage lacks love and friendship.  I guess the ultimate goal of being together in a marriage and being happy is determined by the love factor and our determination to get through difficulties which will arise.

Steve Harvey wrote a book, which states, if a man tells you “we are friends” then believe it. This statement for many women may give them the impression that more will come, and possibly more will come down the line, but maybe not. I have spoken to many people who claim their relationship started off as friends, and then they married each other. Their marriage is like being married to their best friend, and they are very happy. Others, have waited for many years for marriage to their special friend to no avail.

As I am writing this blog, I can think of at least two women who dated a man for over 20 years and they never married. Both women desired marriage, but marriage never came. In fact, one woman was with her special friend for over 21 years. They went their separate ways, he found salvation, another woman, and married his new friend within six months.

So my question, how long should a woman wait for a man to ask her to marry him? Now, I can hear many women say, why should she wait? Or, she can ask him? Hum, but, I’m of the mindset, that men should ask women. I admit, I’m old-fashioned and my thinking is based on the Bible – he who finds a wife finds a good thing and finds favor with G-d; but, I also believe, most women would prefer being asked by the love of their life, and not the other way black couplearound. Disagree? Tell me all about it. I would love to hear your opinions.

Anyway, back to my point. Relationships can be challenging, but also invigorating and wonderful. I believe it depends on the willingness of each person to give 100% of their efforts to enjoy the relationship and contribute doing their very best to be the kind of person which makes a loving and positive difference in the relationship. I believe couples have to be very best friends, in addition to being in-love, committed, loyal and G-d fearing to name just a few.

Relationships based on love, true love will stand the test of time.  Issues must  become non-issues when it comes to choosing to do what is required to work things out.  When things are fantastic, great, exciting, and new in a relationship – we know and understand how easy and glorious the flow between a couple can be.  However, when things are strained, stressful, challenging, etc., in those times, love must prevail, if the relationship is going to survive.

In case you forgot, no one is perfect, not me or you.  Therefore, what we bring to the table in a marriage is love and raloneespect, and a willingness to grow; that is, if you love someone and desire to be with them. If not, then single-hood has its advantages as many of us are well aware.  But, at the end of the day, having someone dear and special to navigate through this planet, called life, is worth the effort to be a great mate committed to love, transparency, and understanding towards their spouse.

As I have matured, I have met a lot of people with a lot of money! I mean multi-millionaires! By the way, I’m expecting my millions today in the mail! Seriously!! 

As I was saying, I have met and become acquainted with many rich people, and though their money can buy almost anything, it can’t buy happiness or a stress free marriage.  I know people who are just getting by (financially), but are extremely happy with their life-mate.

Again, my point, relationships can be challenging, but so is everything else at least some things at some point. Our choice…choose to love your spouse, because at the end of the day, we have to decide who and what is most important. As always, you decide…woman man quote

Just Musing,

Dr. Dee

My-History

Recently, I found my journal from 2009 as I was watching my grandson.  As I began reading “my-history”, I was amazed at how far G-d[1] has brought me!  Those of you, who know me very well, have some sense of the horrific pain, I endured because of a martial separation and eventual divorce, which began to unfold from many years earlier, with the official separation on July 25, 2009. past future road sign

However, this blog is not to bring up the past in any negative way!  The purpose of this writing is to praise G-d for how far He has brought me, and to thank Him for His healing love and hopefully to encourage you, my reader!  As I read my thoughts from the past, truly emotional vomit, I am astonished at how depressed and miserable I was at that time in my life.  Some of my entries seemed as though I was reading about a strange woman I had never met. Some of the entries of events were of things I do not even remember!  Imagine that! When G-d does a trans-formative work in our hearts, we truly will forget some of the horrific things we may have endured.

My heart was so very broken during that period in my life, I could not see the new beginning and the new life G-d had waiting for me!  All I saw was misery, pain, sadness, gloom and doom!  When I became single, I was so scared, and worried about everything that my head, heart and body ached what seemed like all the time.  Yet, few knew of the great agony oozing in my soul for so many months, because I hid behind my smiles, laughs, my false exterior.  There was no need to carry my hurt for the world to see….because the world could not help me.  Nor did I want to be the topic of gossip, so I appeared okay as my heart bled living within my shattered world once again. FreshPaint-brokeness

Then, as time passed, I sensed G-d telling me to get it together, lose weight, prepare for the husband He was sending and prepare for ministry.  So slowing, I began to date, work on my weight, and spend time in prayer and writing in my journal. Now, I feel great, I look great, and I am ready for G-d’s choice (husband) to step into my life.  I am also ready for ministry, as G-d has concretely demonstrated to me that He has made me that Proverbs 31 woman by His Spirit in spite of my many sins and errors!  Am I perfect, far from it…but I am ready to be what He has destined for me to be.

In closing, I read a quote from David Bryant’s book, Messengers of Hope…. to hope in G-d is not to escape from reality; rather it is to have the courage to look reality straight in the eyes.  The MOMENT we hold now is not our final destiny in Mashiach (Christ)!  This quote is so profound, because no hurt or situation is greater than the healing, restorative and redemptive work of our Almighty. There is healing, newness and wholeness in our Savior, if we hold onto Him during our times of difficulty, and His promises for those who trust in Him.

Please know and believe that G-d will be with you as you go through whatever it is that may be weighting heavy on your heart as you read this blog.  He will see you through and He does hear our prayers.  He is the Resurrection and the Life. I am so happy that I serve the Living G-d whose arms are not too short to save His people or His ear deaf to our cries!

FreshPaint-resurrection life

Be encouraged today, and know that this moment is not your final destination in Messiah. This truly will pass. However, you decide if you will be better or bitter on the other side of your drama.

The choice is always your call.

DocsMusings,

Dr. Dee

**********************

[1]The “o” is missing for G-d and L-rd as a sign of respect and honor, for He is the Most Holy G-d, the One True One, the Creator, and Sustainer of the universe, and He is the Uncaused Cause. By leaving the “o” out of G-d and/or L-rd, it makes the distinction that I am not speaking of an idol, or any other entity, which uses the name “god”. This writer is referring to the one true G-d who revealed Himself to Moses as the I AM. In addition, it is my belief this is one of the ways, I can fulfill the first commandment.  The first commandment commanded believers to honor the L-rd’s name. Therefore, by eliminating the “o”, His name (HaShem, G-d) is honored, if the paper were thrown away, burned or destroyed in some manner, as well as for the benefit of online readers to reiterate Who He Is. It is this author’s intention to honor G-d in every area, in traditional and non-traditional ways as directed and led by G-d’s Breath – the Holy Spirit.

Tips For Marriage Counseling Success

FreshPaint white couple

 

 

Has your marriage hit a brick wall? Are your attempts at solving conflict seem futile? If so, then counseling may be one of your answers. However, going to marriage counseling is not just about showing up and sitting down. Counseling success is hinged on active engagement, honesty and transparency. Therefore, in order for marriage counseling to have the best chances for your success, here are some tips.

  1. List the reasons why you need to speak to a third person. Are you having communication issues, intimacy issues, financial issues, etc. Clarify and write down your reason(s) prior to your first counseling session. Be sure to interview several marriage counselors or coaches and select someone you both feel comfortable with and someone who is committed to your success. If you are a Messianic/Christian couple, select someone who has the same biblical mindset.
  2. Set goals for the marriage. For Example: we both want to save our marriage, we want to better communicate with each other, we want to respect each other’s differences, etc. Again, be clear on the reason(s) as to why you are seeking counseling. Ensure that both partners are still interested in saving the marriage, and there isn’t a desire for a separation or divorce.
  3. Commit to the process for at least 6 months to a year in order to give yourselves the full opportunity of working out issues. Sometimes issues are related to childhood baggage and/or unresolved hurts from previous relationships. Committing to the process will ensure you get to the root of the problem so healing can transpired.FreshPaint-certificate of marriage
  4. Do not threaten separation or divorce during the time of counseling to which both of you have committed. Any threats of divorce will certainly undermine the success of the counseling.
  5. Be ready to take responsibility for your part in the marriage difficulties. Be accountable and willing to ask forgiveness and work on improving self. It is essential that you are willing to change personally for the better. Think about the accusations your spouse makes consistently concerning your behavior during an argument or whenever. If those comments are the same, then consider your words and behavior, which may need to change, or attempt to understand why your response is irritated by your behavior.
  6. Do not complain or speak negatively about your spouse to others, especially during the counseling period. Give yourself the best opportunity to reconcile differences within the marriage. Sometimes, people, especially friends will interject negativity into the situation, which could include advice to leave to give up on the marriage. This will weaken the reconciliation process, if not destroy any chances of resolution. If you must speak to someone, make sure it is someone who will fully support your efforts, and desires the best for you and your spouse.
  7. Prior to meeting with your coach or counselor, do not tell your spouse what to say during your counseling sessions. Remember, the only way to healing is through complete honesty and transparency. There is no need to feel embarrassed during a session with your coach or counselor. They are there to help.
  8. Make counseling sessions and the homework a priority. Counseling is only as good as the work each person is willing to put in to grow individually and as a couple.
  9. Realize there is no over-night cure. Again, stick with your obligation to go through counseling and be willing to honestly look at your great, good and awful behaviors, commit to change, and commit to the process.black and white couple

Challenges within a marriage are par for the course. However, couples who truly love each other and are committed to each other can overcome grievances and challenges, and enjoy their lives together. Choosing someone to journey with you as a couple can be one of the answers to your difficulties. Yet, as a couple, you have to be willing to put forth the effort to heal the wounded areas in your relationship. The choice is always yours.

Just Musing,

Dr. Dee