Tag Archives: Thinking

2017 Spring Break

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Arrived at the Atlanta airport on Thursday, March 30th with every intention on catching a flight to Denver, CO on a buddy pass. I arrived at the airport at 4:15 PM and left the ATL airport at 10:30 PM and returned to my home. All flights were full and I was left behind. Yes, I was a little disappointed, but not discouraged.

Saturday, April 1st arrived at Atlanta airport at 6:00 AM with every intention and desire to catch a flight to Denver, CO on a buddy pass. All flights were full up to 2:00 PM, but I was still hopeful and met someone. We spent the next four hours chatting. It was a very nice meeting and certainly a G-d thing!

At 6:05 PM the flight leaving for Denver, CO as well as the remaining flights until 9:45 PM were full, and again, I was left behind. Yes, a little disappointed, but not discouraged. I called Uber and had a very nice driver. I sat in the front, and we chatted and exchanged cell numbers. It was very pleasant. Secretly, I was a little nervous, because it was my first Uber ride. But, G-d, as always has a way of showing me who is truly in control.

All flights were booked, and only my luggage had a spring break in Denver. So, even though I had every intention and desire to fly out on Tuesday, April 4, 2017, I decided to have my bags flown back to Atlanta on Monday.

On Monday, April 3rd, my mom and I drove to the airport to pick up my bags. Again, on Monday the 3rd I was looking forward to flying to Denver, and a great friend of mine was going to drive me to the airport at 5:00 AM on Tuesday, April 4th.

Monday evening, I received a text that all flights were booked, and there was little chance I would get to Denver on a buddy pass  for the rest of the week. So, I decided to look for a ticket, for the remaining time I would have in Denver.  However, for the amount of the fare, it just did not seem practical for just three days. So, with a positive attitude, I realized that this Spring Break of 2017, Denver would not be graced with my presence. Yet, all was/is not lost.

Many positives came out of this experience as well as some lessons.

Lesson One – forget a buddy pass especially during a high-flying season.  Buy a ticket!

Lesson Two – focus on the positives and look for all the blessings in the midst of what could be very frustrating. (Yet again, a little sad, but never irate or discouraged.) I was determined to be led by G-d, and to focus on where He was leading. I can’t claim to be led by G-d, and then scream at Him when things look opposite of what I desire. Easy? What do you think? I digress…some encouraging things I realized.

Positives:

  1. Ride to the airport – Thursday afternoon (friend from work)
  2. Picked up from the airport at 10:30 PM during a horrible thunder storm (son)
  3. Taken back to the airport the next day at 5:15 AM (son) – I live about 45 minutes away from the airport without traffic and bad weather.
  4. Picked up from the airport at 10:30 PM (Very nice Uber driver)
  5. Met someone at the airport and spent 4 hours together, exchanged information, promised to stay in-touch.
  6. Helped by someone else who lives in Denver when I got confused about travel gate
  7. Chatted with a very nice person as we waited for the next flight
  8. Saw a co-worker in the women’s restroom on her way to Florida
  9. Full refund on my buddy pass
  10. All luggage returned from Denver with excellent customer service
  11. Nice outing with my mom when we went to pick up my luggage and glorious weather
  12. Safety
  13. Family/friends checking on me to make sure I was fine

My point, I am going to Colorado, but apparently, this spring break was not the appointed time. So, for the rest of my stay-vacation, fun and rest was on the menu.

And, fun and rest it was!

 

#DocsMusings!

Dr. Dee

Life-long Resolutions

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What are some of the goals you have for the next 6 months or for the next year? This is always the time of year when many folks set goals for themselves. I set goals as well. Some goals I’ve achieved, and some are a work in progress. However, some goals in my opinion, ought to be life-long resolutions. Listed below are ten of those life-long determinations I think are important.

 1. Free of Worry (Matthew 6: 25-34)

Worry is a waste of mental energy and accomplishes nothing. Worry is very debilitating and hard to overcome. But, with much prayer and effort, we can learn not to worry, and instead walk in faith. Many times that which we worry about NEVER happens anyway or at least the results are better than expected.

 

2. Pray (317 times mentioned in Scripture) 

We have not because we ask not, and when we do ask, we ask amiss or based on our selfish desires.  (James 4:3) However, if we delight in the L-rd and allow His desires for us to line up with our desires, we’ll find our worry will subside among many other things, and we can be confident in G-d who hears and answers our prayers.

3. Count your blessings with a grateful heart

Dwell on all the wonderful things you have or have experienced. Focus on how much G-d loves you and your family, and on all the ways He demonstrates His love each day. Be grateful and count your countless blessings.

 

4. Stay active

Commit to get up and move more.  There are many ways you can commit to staying active. Start in ways which are best or fun for you. Consider parking at the far end of the shopping parking lot to get effort steps in. Grab your spouse, kids or a friend and dance to your favorite song. Walk the dog, jump rope or join the gym. But, choose to stay active.

 

5. Eat Well

Pay attention to your eating choices. Eat in moderation and limit sugar and salt. Eat the minimum servings of fruits and vegetables every day, and take whole food supplements. www.mybailoutoption.com  Make a decision to eat to live and not live to eat.

 

6. Hydrate

Drink plenty of water each day. The Mayo Clinic recommends approximately 109 ounces or 13 cups for the adult male, and 9 cups or 72 ounces for the adult female. I follow the guideline of 1/2 ounce of water per ideal weight. So, for example, if a person weighs 150 pounds, their water intake should be 75 ounces per day roughly equivalent to the 72 ounces . I’m not a medical doctor, but based on my research this seems to work. www.mybailoutoption.com

 

7. Smile

Pledge to smile more and you will feel and look better. Smiling will also help others to see you in a positive light and smiling spreads a little joy. Smile even if you do not feel like it, because regardless of your current situation, if you think hard enough, there is something in your life that makes you smile. A smile is a small light of joy. We have been called to be a light in the world.

 

 8. Show love 

There are many ways to show people you love them. Figure out ways to show others how much you love them and do it. Commit to spend quality time with your spouse, children and others without any technological interference. (You know what I mean…TV, tablet, cell phone, laptop, etc.) Be the positive difference in your homes, at the office, your place of worship, and choose every opportunity to show love.

 

9. Listen and hear before speaking 

We have two ears, so we might be quick to listen and slow to speak. (James 1:19) But, listening must involve hearing and understanding. Try to listen and understand the speaker before speaking. Choose your words carefully, and in the mist of conflict attack the issue and not the character of the person.

 

10. Celebrate 

Most importantly, get in touch with the Creator and be a follower and doer of His Word. Depend on His love, understanding, provisions, and teachings to guide and direct your journey. When you fail, acknowledge failure, and ask for forgiveness. Once you have sought G-d’s forgiveness, keep moving forward in the purposes divinely specified for you. Believe that G-d loves you and desires the best for you; then love yourself as if you believe G-d truly loves you, and love others accordingly. Celebrate each day the goodness of the L-rd*, your life, your family and all that helps you fulfil your purpose.

#DocsMusings,

Dr. Dee

*Note:  The “o” is missing for G-d and L-rd as a sign of respect and honor, for He is the Most Holy G-d, the One True One, the Creator, and Sustainer of the entire universe, and He is the Uncaused Cause. By leaving the “o” out of G-d and/or L-rd, it makes the distinction that I am not speaking of an idol, or any other entity, which uses the name “god”. This writer is referring to the One True G-d who revealed Himself to Moses as the I AM. In addition, it is my belief this is one of the ways, I can fulfill the first commandment. The first commandment directed believers to honor the L-rd’s name. Therefore, by eliminating the “o”, His name (HaShem, G-d) is honored, if the paper were thrown away, burned or destroyed in some manner, as well as for the benefit of online readers. It is this author’s intention to honor G-d in every area, in traditional and non-traditional ways as directed and led by G-d’s Breath – the Holy Spirit.

Happy 2017!!! My prayer for you!

Loving G-d, , , , , , , , , , ,

Happy 2017!!!! May G-d bless you and keep you and my His face shine upon you , your family and your friends!

Much Love,

Dr. Dee

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Helping Hands

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Some preacher once said, that in order to get past your own hurt, we need to help others in an effort to become less SELF-focused and more OTHER-focused. Well, last week, I had an opportunity to work with many people who were OTHER-focused, and I was truly blessed! My experience benefited me, more than my efforts benefited those I was helping. WHY? Because I had an opportunity to stop thinking about mySELF and think and do for OTHERS, along with a bunch of great people! two-peoplw-helping-hands

I am really amazed at how many New Year’s resolutions (including mine) rarely include helping others! Many of the resolutions I hear or read about speak to losing weight, spending more time with family and friends, stop smoking, get out of debt, and/or saving money, stop drinking, etc. However, how many New Year’s resolutions revolve around giving up personal time and money to help those who are destitute, lonely, broke and hopeless, maybe even homeless? I don’t know about you, but I am guilty as charged! And, unless the Spirit of G-d moves us to STOP thinking about ourSELF, we will continue to perpetuate self-focus and me-Me-ME! This is not G-d’s best, for we are a community inside and outside of the church walls.

black-and-white-hands

Prior to moving to this infamous peach state, I volunteered off and on in California during my teenage years and as an adult. I found my experiences extremely rewarding and loved the opportunities to help others and meet new people. However, since moving to Georgia, my interests, twisted by life circumstances hindered my desires to volunteer. Yet, due to G-d’s nudging, one of my goals for this year is to be more OTHER-focused by getting more involved in community projects.

So, what does this have to do with you? I want to urge you to find an organization and donate your time, money and talents to help others, especially if you find yourself depressed and sad. Helping others as a wounded healer is the best way to recognize G-d’s gifting and blessings in your life and the life of others! It is the best way to stop focusing on yourself, the drama and/or drudgery of this life. It is a fantastic way to give away love and help heal another.

Be a blessing to others! Love your neighbor as you love yourself! Spread joy and happiness! Be the salt and light by giving first to G-d and then to others!

#DocsMusings,

Dr. Dee

Love Reflections

My son came for a brief visit from Korea. It was great seeing him and spending time with him. As I reflect on our visit, I am amazed at how fast the time has passed and how very little we get to see each other, because of the physical landscape which divides us. However, in reality we are not separated, because of the great love we have for each other. I am grateful for the time we had together.

This reflection mirrors in a very tiny way the love G-d has for His people! Even though we don’t physically see our Heavenly Father, His presence is like the wind – we feel Him, we embrace His love, and we know He is there! (John 3:8)

I am often amazed by the great love G-d has for me in spite of my failures and flaws. His love fills my heart and guides me as I am obedient to His will. Even more special is that G-d’s love is available to all who choose to grab hold of his garment and journey with Him.

I am reading a book which speaks to the fact that our days must be propelled by our view of eschatology as the promise of G-d. In other words, we must base our today knowing that G-d’s promises and love are our horizon and our goal! We might want to consider living in ways, which are pleasing to G-d, since He promised He would be back, as oppose to living our lives independent of Him.

Love is one of those words which we hear – more often than its practices imply! I am encouraged to love G-d and love others, because He first loved me and continues to love me! I am encouraged to love those who abuse me, and mistreat me; even my enemies, because Yeshua  (Jesus) modeled great love for those who hated Him.

Be encouraged to love others and spend time with them while it is today. Let those you love know you love them by your words, actions and deeds. Never be afraid to say, I love and appreciate you.

#DocsMusings,

Dr. Dee

Blessed Appointments

These are the appointed times of YHWH, set-apart gatherings, which you are to proclaim at their appointed times. Leviticus 23:4

biblical-feasts

G-d, Himself set appointments for His people. The Hebrew word translated for both appointed feasts and appointed season in this verse is moed, plural moedim.

These annual feasts were set by G-d as times for Him and His people to meet in a distinctive way. Under the Original Covenant, the observation of these feasts were a requirement for the nation of Israel.

Now, as I write, we are in the season for the Fall Feasts. They are Rosh Hashanah – head of the year, and also known as Yom Teruah or Feast of Trumpets; Yom Kippur – Day of Atonement, beginning nine days after Rosh Hashanah; and Sukkot – or Feast of Tabernacles beginning four days after Yom Kippur.

Many Believers in Messiah pay little to no attention to these feasts, and fail to observe them.  Therefore, I believe miss out on the rich heritage on which our faith is built. The coming or returning of our Messiah is detailed in these feasts and petitions for the undivided attention of each Believer. These feasts were revealed by G-d for His own particular reasons, and through them all Believers can be blessed. Some theologians would argue that we are under no obligation to keep G-d’s appointed times according to the Renewed Covenant; I would beg to differ based on the model Yeshua (Jesus) left for us to emulate, especially since the word declares, He is the same yesterday, today and forever. (Malachi 3:6, Hebrews 13:8) However, be clear, these feast do not take the place of our salvation in Messiah, they are practical and blessed ways to see prophetic implications and show Him our love.

Each moed represents a blessed appointment with the Father, if one’s heart is to seek and honor Him. These biblical feasts are a celebration of G-d’s appointments and a source of spiritual enrichment, reflection, repentance and redirection. Each feast allows us to stop from our daily routines, and draw near to G-d in a fresh and special way.

yom-kippurThe ultimate meaning of each moed is found in Messiah Yeshua, and to revel in these feasts helps us to understand Him as the vivid prophetic Savior of the world. Consider these two examples: Yeshua was the Pesach Lamb (Passover Lamb), the Lamb of G-d who took away the sins of the World. (John 1:29) Yeshua was/is our atonement who has reconciled us with the Father, Yom Kippur. (Romans 3:23-26) Our faith, I believe, is strengthen as our love deepens and our hearts overflow with gratitude, as we realize all G-d had planned for us prior to the foundation of the world. I believe, that when we commit to these feasts as a practical application of our worship to the King, we draw near to the Holy One and experience His majesty.

I believe as we commit to G-d’s appointed times, it allows us to rest from the busyness, stresses and distractions of daily life. Each feast, as well as the weekly Shabbat (Sabbath) is designed for our rest, and pause from the cares of this existence, as we focus on Him, and His greatness. G-d’s Shabbat is designed for our physical and spiritual refreshment, and is one of His moedim.

I believe when we commit to G-d’s appointed times, we encounter His glory in a profound way, which nurtures us to become more like Him. Since, He set up the appointment, it seems to me that we should meet Him at His appointed times, as well as each day.

This is a very special and consecrated time of year for those of us who choose to believe that G-d does not change, and attempt to honor Him by observing His appointed times. Our Creator, G-d has set the appointed time, why would you choose to miss the appointment and miss out on His blessings?

#DocsMusing,

Dr. Dee

happy-rosh-hashanahL’Shana Tova! Blessings for a good and sweet New Year!

May your New Year be filled with the sweetness and prosperity found only in Yeshua’s (Jesus) abundant grace.

Welcome the Jewish Year 5777!

Rosh Hashanah or the Feast of Trumpets – rings in the Jewish New Year with 100 blasts of the shofar. shofar It begins the High Holy Days and is a time for celebration, as well as reflection.

As Jewish people the world over consider the coming year, they pray for G-d’s forgiveness, and that He will “seal” them in the Book of Life for the year ahead. Year by year, they pray to be acceptable in His sight.

As Believers, in Yeshua, we have been brought near to G-d through the righteousness of Messiah and we are sealed in the Lamb’s Book of Life. (Ephesians 1:13, 2:13, Revelation 13:6) Let us rejoice in the salvation of our King and L-rd, reflect on all His goodness and tender mercies, and let us pray for each other,  for the Shalom (peace) of Jerusalem and the world. black-man-shofar

L’Shana Tova!

Dr. Dee

Uncertainty

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My L-rd* G-d, I have no idea where I am going. I do not see the road ahead of me. I cannot know for certain where it will end. Nor, do I really know myself, and the fact that I think I am following your will does not mean I am actually doing so. But, I believe that the desire to please you, does, in fact, please you. And I hope I have that desire in all that I am doing. I hope that I will never do anything apart from that desire. And, I know that if I do this you will lead me by the right road, though I may know nothing about it. Therefore, I will trust you always though I may seem to be lost and in the shadow of death. I will not fear, for you are ever with me, and you will never leave me to face my perils alone. (Prayer composed by Thomas Merton, a Trappist Monk)

Recently, I was watching an episode of West Wing on Netflix, and I heard one of the characters in the program paraphrase the prayer above. I was captivated by the prayer and decided to find out if the prayer was fiction or if in fact, had someone really composed this prayer. In the Netflix version, the character says, I always don’t know the right thing to do, L-rd, but, I think the fact that I want to please you pleases you.

 ocean-waveThis prayer is very intriguing, because it speaks to our weaknesses and our heart motives as believers in the Most High G-d. I find it very interesting that life is often challenging and difficult at best; and yet, most fulfilling as well. And, still, often times we, at least me, has no idea where I am going. My desires and dreams seem to keep pointing me in a certain direction, but the course and the ultimate goal is an uncertainty.

Many might say this sentiment exudes a lack of faith, determination, a certain grit, if you will. And, though dreams, desires and goals are necessary and a productive force as we travel this life, the end results, prior to the end results are completely unknown with absolute certainty! I propose that if the end were absolutely known, the entire sense of celebration during the process and  at the end, as well as the need for faith would be a waste of time.

G-d, however, did not call us to know exactly how things would turn out in this life with utter cast-iron certainty. goals-picHe did call us to trust Him with our dreams, desires, needs and/or goals. He has called us to love Him with the desire to please Him, even in our uncertainty of what lies ahead.

I believe in G-d and choose to embrace His subjection over me. He has proven His love, provision, protection over and over again in my life, the life of my family, friends and even those I do not know or dislike. The fact that you are reading this blog, proves that you are still here for a reason. Now, you may not believe in the G-d of Abraham, Isaac, Jacob and Yeshua, but irrespective of that point, He is subject over all things and all things are subject under Him.

My point, as a G-d fearer, I feel all the things the Word of G-d tells me not to feel at times. Yet, my true heart’s desire is to please G-d and be an imitator of Yeshua (Jesus). My flesh is weak, and though He is greater in me than he who is in the world, more times than not, my weakness rules! And, yet I always desire to please Adonai (L-rd). My desire is to please Him and to do His will.

When Thomas Merton wrote this prayer, supposedly he was in a dark place. I have experienced many dark places, and sometimes darkness still nudges at my soul as I navigate this life. Many of us understand the depths of darkness, and yet, we grapple for light-bridgethe light knowing it is our only hope of salvation in this life, and the life to come. G-d who sees all and does whatever He pleases (Ps. 115:3), I believe, understands us far beyond our ability to understand ourselves – thus our need for a Savior. Merton’s prayer exudes a sense of pure humility and dependence on the Creator for guidance in all matters of life, as well as a plea for understanding his motives.

We sometimes exemplify our false sense of being in control to no avail; and, thus, we are amazed when things go awry in our lives. For those of us calling ourselves believers, whether it is by the name Christian, Messianic, Followers of the Way, G-d Fearers, Believers or some other name, our first response is to love Him and desire to please Him.

So today, as I ramble on and deeply consider the nuances of this prayer, I ask you to do the same. My thoughts and feelings are all over the place this morning, because I don’t know for certain where I’m going, but I do know WHO to put my trust in.

#JustMusing

Dr. Dee

Note two things:

  • The “o” is missing for G-d and L-rd as a sign of respect and honor, for He is the Most Holy G-d, the One true One, the Creator, and Sustainer of the universe, and He is the Uncaused Cause. By leaving the “o” out of G-d and/or L-rd, it makes the distinction that I am not speaking of an idol, or any other entity, which uses the name “god”. This writer is referring to the one true G-d who revealed Himself to Moses as the I AM. In addition, it is my belief this is one of the ways, I can fulfill the first commandment. The first commandment commanded believers to honor the L-rd’s name. Therefore, by eliminating the “o”, His name (HaShem, G-d) is honored, if the paper were thrown away, burned or destroyed in some manner, as well as for the benefit of online readers. It is this author’s intention to honor G-d in every area, in traditional and non-traditional ways as directed and led by G-d’s Breath – the Holy Spirit.
  • Photos taken from Fresh Paint and program purchased.

 

 

 

 

Enjoy The Process

Health and Wellness, Loving G-d, Loving Self, , , , , , ,

goal

Ever heard the following?

  • Enjoying the process
  • Smelling the roses along the way
  • Comfortable with being uncomfortable
  • Trusting when the end is not near
  • Seeing where only faith leads
  • Prayer were no other path leads
  • Goal achieved now what…

For me, they all mean the same thing…

Recently, I read that achievement seldom produces a sense of lasting happiness as one might think. I can truly attest to this. After receiving my doctorate, I thought I would be so happy, but shortly after graduation, (which by the way, no one could attend), it was really no big deal, and I have considered going back to school, and getting another graduate degree. For me, being in school afforded me a definite sense of purpose, a refuge, a circle of acquaintances, and a goal to work towards. In other words, a sense of direction. I have found, and other experts as well, that once a person finally accomplishes a goal, at least two new goals come along unexpectedly. And, that which we worked so hard to achieve, and chased after for so long, soon becomes the status quo. Yet, our achievement though exhilarating, along with a sense of satisfaction, we are also frustrated and desiring a new adventure or goal. In my case, I had mixed emotions. On the one hand I was excited about earning my degree; yet, I thought and felt…now what? What am I going to do now?

Consider other goals, whether losing weight, getting a promotion, some business venture, exotic vacation or even considering marriage. If you have ever been in love, then, you know about those special moments of euphoria and the fluttering of your heart when you think about that special someone, hear their voice and/or lay your eyes on them! Remember when you couldn’t wait to see them or hear their voice, or how much you hated to say goodbye? Then something began to change, especially after the honeymoon for at least 50% of marriages in this country.

How many of you longed, even ached to get married? Many people who have anxiously anticipated being married to their lover, soul mate, and/or best friend of choice in a blissful ever after scenario, have been devastated by the nightmare they felt trapped in. Once married, they were disillusioned by the difficulties of living with this special someone, and often times fled the relationship. Again, at least 50% of married folks in this country choose to flee their marriages, though some need to flee, many of us are afraid or unwilling to die to self and be a loving spouse. Yet, those who endure to the end tend to thrive through the challenges, and happily live their lives with their mate.

Our goals in life whether reached or not gives us a sense of purpose or at least helps us to feel worthy of this opportunity called life. However, I have found that often times, people are so focused on the goal, that they fail to enjoy the process, or give up when matters get difficult. I have been guilty of this.

Many of us get so focused on the goal, that we fail to enjoy the process or we flee from our purpose in hopes of escaping whatever we find problematic. Yet, in my many years on planet earth, I have come to realize that we/I must enjoy the process in all areas of my life, or life is just existing; or in many cases just working to survive and going through the motions.Health500

Now, when it comes to work, I can hang with the best of them. As a matter of information, all the letters behind my name were earned as an adult, raising children, while unemployed, during an extremely challenging marriage(s), during a divorce(s), working full time, deaths of family members, and/or working full time. I know about working, multi-tasking and the like. I mean intimately acquainted with trying to do it all! Even now, as a mature woman working full-time, building a business, co-producing a radio program, writing a book, this blog, etc., more often than not, I feel like the absent-minded professor running around doing it all, yet doing nothing or at least not getting it all accomplished in the manner most effective without sleep deprivation, irritability, stress and the like!

Still, in spite of the challenges or the goals we aim for, I have learned that we must enjoy life along the way. I have found that doing the following things on a consistent basis are extremely helpful for enjoying the process of life as you reach for your goals, after achieving your goals; and then reaching for new or higher goals. We should always strive for higher and worthy goals! This is a biblical principle handed down from Heaven. Therefore, I live by the following and I encourage you to embrace many if not all as well:

  • Daily prayer, reading G-d’s Word, and interaction with like-minded people
  • Sleep/Rest: G-d created the Shabbat (Sabbath) for a reason. He knew many of us would work ourselves into the grave as a result of unbalanced or an obsession to achieve our goals or dreams. Our insistence on embracing sleep-deprivation and lack of rest causes chronic tiredness, illness, irritability, stress and premature death. We need a weekly Shabbat for a reason. Really and truly, sleep will find us whether we like it or not.
  • sabbathHealthy Choices: Sleep/rest is a healthy choice, but also the foods we eat. Choose clean foods, minimize fast foods, processed foods, soda and sugar. You will feel different and be more energetic with mental clarity.
  • Exercise is vital for weight loss, flexibility, stress reduction and more. We need to exercise our bodies to optimally perform each day. Our bodies are the only place we have to live.
  • Celebrate and love others.
  • Be grateful for all things in your life. Celebrate the great and good. Learn from the not-so-good.
  • Help others achieve and grow. Be an example of determination, persistence and generosity.
  • Try to see the good and have a positive attitude.
  • Spend time doing things you enjoy and spend time with family and friends.
  • Laugh, have fun and enjoy being you. Laughter does do the heart, mind, soul good!

live in bodyWorthy goals, dreams, and desires, as well as working towards them have their place. Yet, on the way to success, remember to enjoy life throughout the process. Once you achieve whatever goal(s) you are longing for, enjoy that process and the new goals soon to follow. Again, enjoy wherever you find yourself in life, otherwise, what awaits you on the other side, may be more disappointing than you imagined.

#DocsMusing,

Dr. Dee

Challenging Relationships

Loving G-d, Loving Self, Relationships, , , , , , , , ,

couple on red couchRelationships can be challenging especially when goals and desires are different, and the marriage lacks love and friendship.  I guess the ultimate goal of being together in a marriage and being happy is determined by the love factor and our determination to get through difficulties which will arise.

Steve Harvey wrote a book, which states, if a man tells you “we are friends” then believe it. This statement for many women may give them the impression that more will come, and possibly more will come down the line, but maybe not. I have spoken to many people who claim their relationship started off as friends, and then they married each other. Their marriage is like being married to their best friend, and they are very happy. Others, have waited for many years for marriage to their special friend to no avail.

As I am writing this blog, I can think of at least two women who dated a man for over 20 years and they never married. Both women desired marriage, but marriage never came. In fact, one woman was with her special friend for over 21 years. They went their separate ways, he found salvation, another woman, and married his new friend within six months.

So my question, how long should a woman wait for a man to ask her to marry him? Now, I can hear many women say, why should she wait? Or, she can ask him? Hum, but, I’m of the mindset, that men should ask women. I admit, I’m old-fashioned and my thinking is based on the Bible – he who finds a wife finds a good thing and finds favor with G-d; but, I also believe, most women would prefer being asked by the love of their life, and not the other way black couplearound. Disagree? Tell me all about it. I would love to hear your opinions.

Anyway, back to my point. Relationships can be challenging, but also invigorating and wonderful. I believe it depends on the willingness of each person to give 100% of their efforts to enjoy the relationship and contribute doing their very best to be the kind of person which makes a loving and positive difference in the relationship. I believe couples have to be very best friends, in addition to being in-love, committed, loyal and G-d fearing to name just a few.

Relationships based on love, true love will stand the test of time.  Issues must  become non-issues when it comes to choosing to do what is required to work things out.  When things are fantastic, great, exciting, and new in a relationship – we know and understand how easy and glorious the flow between a couple can be.  However, when things are strained, stressful, challenging, etc., in those times, love must prevail, if the relationship is going to survive.

In case you forgot, no one is perfect, not me or you.  Therefore, what we bring to the table in a marriage is love and raloneespect, and a willingness to grow; that is, if you love someone and desire to be with them. If not, then single-hood has its advantages as many of us are well aware.  But, at the end of the day, having someone dear and special to navigate through this planet, called life, is worth the effort to be a great mate committed to love, transparency, and understanding towards their spouse.

As I have matured, I have met a lot of people with a lot of money! I mean multi-millionaires! By the way, I’m expecting my millions today in the mail! Seriously!! 

As I was saying, I have met and become acquainted with many rich people, and though their money can buy almost anything, it can’t buy happiness or a stress free marriage.  I know people who are just getting by (financially), but are extremely happy with their life-mate.

Again, my point, relationships can be challenging, but so is everything else at least some things at some point. Our choice…choose to love your spouse, because at the end of the day, we have to decide who and what is most important. As always, you decide…woman man quote

Just Musing,

Dr. Dee